– 26th Sun of the 1st Astral Moon
When I saw the signs I should’ve done something. I didn’t. I woke up this morning and found a note and a empty bed.
I’ve never felt more hollow in my entire life. I’ve never felt so alone. So small.
On just the other page I talked about turning things around, but there’s no turning around from this. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to go. I feel lost.
My calm is gone. The one thing I knew I could count on to remind me that the world wasn’t an entirely shitty place is gone.
Why did she go?
Her letter said she wanted to find her parents, but she must have known that I would’ve come with her. I would’ve been aboard the Raven to help her in moments. But I’m not. She didn’t ask. Didn’t she trust me? Was I just in the way? Was I just comfort until she found a lead, no matter how many summers it took? Was I even that?
Zho, I’m sorry. I wish I knew what it was I did wrong. I wish I knew why you didn’t think I could come with you. I wish…
I wish for a lot of things. I think that about sums it up, what I wrote already.
I wish I knew why.